tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-79142848805153880002024-03-04T21:04:21.777-08:00Amie, Adoptive MomIntimate thoughts of an inadequate young mother of fiveAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17768914436706113350noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7914284880515388000.post-87743912240910369432015-09-11T11:43:00.001-07:002015-09-11T11:43:30.892-07:00Resist ApathyOne week ago today, we launched CAFO of the Midlands as a local movement of Christians from the Midlands collaborating on behalf of South Carolina children in foster care and orphans globally. A group of seven believers met in a coffee shop early in the morning and prayed with power and conviction for God himself to work a miracle in our broken foster care system. I was energized by the enthusiasm and determination of the others in that prayer circle. I was filled with hope and convinced that the Lord was moving in a mighty way. <br />
<br />
And then I went back to the office, to the daily grind, to the complaints and frustrations of a red tape system that seems to hinder the well-being of those it is meant to protect. I found myself neck deep in the complications of scheduling inspections, arranging trainings, and filing seemingly redundant paperwork. I found myself griping and groaning and wanting to give up. I actually threatened to flush my own head in the toilet out of sheer exasperation. The forecast for the future of foster care seemed utterly hopeless.<br />
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Oh, how small is my faith? Jesus said in John 14:12-14,<span class="text John-14-12" id="en-NIV-26681"><span class="woj"><sup class="versenum">" </sup>Very truly I tell you, whoever believes<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-26681S" data-link="(<a href="#cen-NIV-26681S" title="See cross-reference S">S</a>)"></sup> in me will do the works I have been doing,<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-26681T" data-link="(<a href="#cen-NIV-26681T" title="See cross-reference T">T</a>)"></sup> and they will do even greater things than these, because I am going to the Father.</span></span> <span class="text John-14-13" id="en-NIV-26682"><span class="woj">And I will do whatever you ask<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-26682U" data-link="(<a href="#cen-NIV-26682U" title="See cross-reference U">U</a>)"></sup> in my name, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son.</span></span> <span class="text John-14-14" id="en-NIV-26683"><span class="woj">You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it."</span></span><br />
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So then, I must choose to resist the apathy that is threatening to extinguish my flickering belief in the power of prayer. I must hold fast to the promise that Jesus will do miracles through me as I pray in line with his will. <br />
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To learn more about the mission of CAFO visit <a href="http://www.facebook.com/CAFOoftheMidlands">www.facebook.com/CAFOoftheMidlands</a> and <a href="http://www.christianalliancefororphans.org./">www.christianalliancefororphans.org.</a> Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17768914436706113350noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7914284880515388000.post-48671886116576802302015-06-04T08:13:00.000-07:002015-06-04T08:13:45.268-07:00Darkness to Light<em><strong>Before I begin this blog, I want to clearly state that all suspicion of child abuse or neglect should be reported to the authorities on every occasion. If you don't know the local child abuse hotline number for where you live, please call 911 and report to law enforcement.</strong></em> <br />
<br />
First of all, let me clarify that this post is not primarily about Josh Duggar, his parents, or his alleged victims. This post is primarily about families who have been affected by sexual abuse, and we are everywhere you look. <strong><em>Yes,</em></strong> <strong><em>we</em></strong> <strong><em>are everywhere you look</em></strong>. I do not intend to give specifics to the public regarding the sexual abuse within my family, but I will say that <em><strong>it has affected me personally both as a child and a mother</strong></em>. It has also affected those in my extended family, many close friends, and my church. <em><strong>Beyond that, I have professionally investigated over a hundred claims of sexual abuse of children and worked with at least twenty families affected by interfamilial child on child sexual abuse. </strong></em>In my present job, I advocate for adults to open their homes to children who have experienced sexual abuse both as victims and perpetrators.<em><strong> So let me make this very clear: sexual abuse within families is not rare!</strong></em> <br />
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When you fill my news feed with your personal opinions, they affect me personally. They affect so many of the people you love and respect personally. I have been silent on this public outrage regarding the Duggar family's experience, carefully considering how to respond. <strong><em>Many will remain silent on this topic, fearing your judgment on their private struggle.</em></strong> You have no idea which of your co-workers, friends, or even family members are silently grieving the public ruin of this family. Out of respect for those whom they love; who they wouldn't dare expose to the public their very private experience of sexual abuse. <strong><em>Blaming the parents for the actions of a child, who clearly acted outside of the moral guidance they provided, is absurd. Accusing them of failing their daughters is appalling.</em></strong> <br />
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According to the police report which has been released, the allegations of child sexual abuse were handled by trained professionals who followed the policies, procedures, and laws related to child abuse. Each family member was personally interviewed regarding the incidents, and a conclusion was made by law enforcement and child protection professionals. <strong><em>When you proclaim that these parents should have their children removed from their custody, you are speaking out of ignorance.</em></strong> Unless you personally investigated these claims and gathered evidence firsthand to make this conclusion based on professional training, you are not qualified to make that judgment call.<br />
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These are the facts. A child fondled his siblings on multiple occasions. In each instance, both children were fully clothed, and the offended child was unaware of the incident, whether asleep or too young to recognize the inappropriate nature of the touch. <strong><em>The conclusion was made that these incidents did not constitute the legal definition of sexual abuse. In addition, based on the evidence, the parents were not found to be neglectful in their response to the sexual behavior.</em></strong> As a professional in this field, I have made the same conclusion given similar circumstances on multiple occasions. The parents created a safety plan, including strict supervision of the offending child, yet the behavior somehow continued. Upon learning this information, the parents separated the offending child from the family for a period of time to receive correction and counseling from a trusted person who shared their values regarding healthy sexuality. The parents took appropriate steps to protect the other children in the house. Since the children who had been violated did not recall the incidents, professional counseling for them would not have been recommended or even appropriate. <br />
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<strong><em>I am sure that my opinion that Josh Duggar is not a child molester will not be popular.</em></strong> As a child, he displayed sexually maladaptive behavior, which was identified and corrected. There is no reason why he should not have a successful career due to his past, nor is there reason to believe that his children are in danger because of it. In addition, there is no reason to believe that his sisters, who were offended by Josh's actions, are brainwashed or crazy for forgiving him. <strong><em>I am thankful that my own inappropriate and even illegal teenage behavior is not held against me as an adult. </em></strong><em><strong>Although I participated in underage drinking, pot smoking, and teen sex before legal age of consent, I have become a social worker, foster parent, and pastor's wife. I dare to say that my own past has made me a more passionate advocate for families and children.</strong></em> <strong><em>My God has turned the darkness into light.</em></strong><br />
<br />
If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me<br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-139-11">and the light become night around me,”</span></span><br /><span class="text Ps-139-12" id="en-NIV-16252"> even the darkness will not be dark<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-16252P" data-link="(<a href="#cen-NIV-16252P" title="See cross-reference P">P</a>)"></sup> to you;</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-139-12">the night will shine like the day,</span></span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-139-12">for darkness is as light to you. (Psalm 139:11-12)</span></span><br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17768914436706113350noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7914284880515388000.post-32433053438175466802014-12-11T14:14:00.000-08:002014-12-11T14:14:06.072-08:00We choose to share our family story both as a testimony to God's faithfulness and a call to others to take a risk to foster and adopt. Many thanks to <a class="profileLink" data-hovercard="/ajax/hovercard/user.php?id=658385091" href="https://www.facebook.com/joe.congleton.7">Joe Congleton</a> and <a class="profileLink" data-hovercard="/ajax/hovercard/user.php?id=100000023431819" href="https://www.facebook.com/rebecca.congleton">Rebecca Congleton</a> of theSurrenduring for permission to use their original song that so perfectly fits how we felt on our foster and adoption journey. Watch our video story at the link below.<br />
<a href="http://youtu.be/DyY-zneVZyk" target="_blank">Risk It All (Cooper Family Story)</a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17768914436706113350noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7914284880515388000.post-31004353107044665532014-11-14T06:33:00.001-08:002014-11-14T06:41:11.061-08:00Winning Parenting BattlesLast night I trained other parents on therapeutic discipline techniques for children from hard places by Dr. Karyn Purvis. This morning I battled my six year old over taking cough medicine, brushing teeth, brushing hair, and putting shoes on. These seem like simple requests, but she panicked about taking medicine which escalated into a full blown power struggle.<br />
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After dropping her off at school, I felt the nudge to read some verses in my Bible app on my phone. I read the verses that popped on the screen.<br />
<br />
Philippians 2:3-4<br />
"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of others."<br />
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Conviction hit me like a bag of bricks. At the heart of this battle was my selfishness. I wanted my way and I won the battle of wills. But what did I really win? Certainly not my daughter's heart. I didn't help her calmly comply with my requests. I used force. And at the end of the discipline neither of us felt content or connected.<br />
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So I confessed out loud in the car to God. I messed up. I need Him to help me look to my daughter's best interest when I discipline her. I want to win the battles for my daughter not against her. Through connection and correction, we can both feel victorious against bad behavior.<br />
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#winning #adoption #badmoments #goodmomma<br />
<br />
<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=761xx61-q1c">Dr. Karyn Purvis IDEAL Response Video</a><br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17768914436706113350noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7914284880515388000.post-20238103403315061782014-10-20T10:33:00.001-07:002014-10-20T10:40:30.017-07:00We Have An Orphan CrisisThis post may not be politically correct, but I don't care. America has an orphan crisis. We call it foster care, but the truth is this: American children are growing up in institutions. And South Carolina, the place I call home, has the most staggering statistics of any state in the union. I will not be silent. Will you?<br />
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<b><u><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">What
is the need?<o:p></o:p></span></span></u></b></div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">There
is an urgent need for foster families in the USA. We have over 3,000
children in the foster care system in South Carolina alone. Statistically, one in
four children does not have access to a foster home, which means they are placed in
residential facilities and group homes. In fact, South Carolina has the highest
percentage of youth under age 12 in residential care of any state in the USA at
23%. This is a shame and a tragedy. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<b><u><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Why
do children come into foster care?<o:p></o:p></span></span></u></b></div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Children
come into care through no fault of their own due to abuse or neglect or the
inability of the parent to care for the child's needs. All children
in foster care have experienced trauma and loss, often resulting in difficulty
adjusting to these changes. These children need caring adults to help them work
through the traumatic experiences and develop healthy ways of coping. Through
therapeutic parenting, the healthy attachment between a child and foster parent
can be the primary means by which children heal.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"></span><br />
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<b><u><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Who
can become a foster parent?<o:p></o:p></span></span></u></b></div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The
idea of a perfect foster family is a myth. The foster care system needs diverse
families because children have diverse needs. Foster parents can be
single or married, working, retired, or stay-at-home parents. Foster families
can rent an apartment, own their own home, or live in a trailer in the country.
What matters most is the safety and stability of the home and family
environment and the parent’s willingness to commit to a child for whatever
length of time the child needs care.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"></span><br />
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<b><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">To
become a South Carolina foster parent, you must to be:<o:p></o:p></span></span></b></div>
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">•At
least 21 years of age<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">•High
School Diploma or GED<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">•Capable
of financially supporting yourself<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">•Have
adequate bedroom space for a child<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">•Pass
criminal and child-abuse background checks<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">•Willing
to submit to a reference check<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">•Willing
to attend training sessions<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"></span><br />
<b><u><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">What
will you do with what you know?<o:p></o:p></span></span></u></b><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Children
need mommies and daddies, not paid staff to care for them. As Christians, we
have a mandate from God to care for orphans. Often times we sponsor orphan
ministry overseas, yet we fail to care for those children in our own
neighborhood who are separated from their parents due to foster care. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Pray about how you can be part of the solution. </span></span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Consider
becoming a foster parent or adopting a child from the foster care system. </span></span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">If
you are unable to foster or adopt, speak up for those who have no voice and
help recruit families. Raise awareness of the need in your state! You can also
raise awareness on social media by liking and sharing pages that advocate for
children. Christian Alliance for Orphans, Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption,
Empowered to Connect, and SAFY of South Carolina are just a few. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Each child
deserves to have a safe and loving family. I truly believe that most people agree. But there is work to be done to see this belief become a reality in our nation. We must persist in this work until
every child is home.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17768914436706113350noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7914284880515388000.post-69707194622326917652014-10-09T11:20:00.000-07:002014-10-09T11:21:31.557-07:00Paradox of PerspectiveThere are blessings in the midst of life's difficulties. <br />
There are difficulties in the midst of life's blessings.<br />
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In this paradox of perspective, which one is true? <br />
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We get to choose. We have a saying in our family that goes like this: "Perhaps you should see things differently." This statement was made by some wise pastor in a message we heard a long time ago, but I can't recall who. There is so much power in this statement, though, so I wish I could give the credit where it is due. The bottom line is clear; though, we choose our attitude.<br />
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Proverbs 15:15 in The Message puts it like this:<br />
"A miserable heart means a miserable life;<br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Prov-15-15"> A cheerful heart fills the day with song."</span></span><br />
<br />
There is so much power in perspective. We choose whether to be critical and harsh or forgiving and patient. We choose whether to be anxious and fearful or calm and peaceful. We choose whether to be passive and lazy or proactive and helpful. <br />
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We have a choice to make: focus on the blessing or dwell on the difficulty. When we choose to dwell on the difficulty, we lose sight of the blessing. But when we zoom in on the blessings, God's goodness is magnified in our lives.<br />
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<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Prov-15-15"></span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Prov-15-15"></span></span><br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17768914436706113350noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7914284880515388000.post-13980494434888959082014-09-16T11:01:00.000-07:002014-09-16T11:11:04.573-07:00Who is Amie, Adoptive Mom?<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Garamond","serif"; font-size: 14pt;">Amie
Cooper is passionate about foster care and adoption. As a college student, Amie
spent a summer as a missionary doing orphan ministry in Zambia, Africa. After
graduating with her Bachelor of Science in Family and Child Development from
Liberty University, Amie pursued a full-time career in social work. Before
having children, she worked as a case manager for the Department of Child
Services in Indiana, investigating child abuse and neglect, placing children in
foster homes, and facilitating adoptions when family reunification was not in a
child’s best interest. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Garamond","serif"; font-size: 14pt;">Overwhelmed
by the lack of foster and adoptive families within their community, Amie and
her husband Zach made a decision to become foster parents themselves. Nevaeh
came to live with them at 2 ½ months old, followed by Christina at age 15 just
six months later. Another six months after that, Mackenzee and Braydyn were
placed in their home, and a year later they found out they were pregnant!
That’s right, the Coopers went from 0 to 5 children in just 2 ½ years! In fact,
they finalized four adoptions and welcomed baby Levi all in a year’s span! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Garamond","serif"; font-size: 14pt;">After
filling up her own home, Amie began recruiting other families to foster and
adopt, which has recently led her family to South Carolina with SAFY as the
statewide recruiter. Amie’s heart’s desire is to encourage families to pursue
foster care and adoption, which spills over from her home life to her full-time
career and her writing. You can read more from Amie Cooper on her personal
blog, Adoptive Mom Amie, in an upcoming devotional, and a book in the works
with her husband on pursuing God’s path as a family. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17768914436706113350noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7914284880515388000.post-77880324405600744952014-09-08T11:39:00.003-07:002014-09-08T11:39:59.131-07:00But, What If?
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I am so blessed beyond measure. I really can't complain. I have a hilarious and handsome husband that I absolutely adore. We have five incredible children. I have the career of my dreams with a flexible schedule and even a paid day off for my birthday. I live in the sunny south, just a quick drive from the beach in a house big enough for guests. My parents are both alive and well. My sisters are my best friends. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">But, what if something goes terribly wrong? What if my husband doesn't think I'm attractive any more because my belly looks like a Dunkin Donut? What if my inconsistent parenting causes attachment disorder and my children can't form healthy relationships with others? </span><span style="font-family: Calibri;">What if I can't live up to the expectations of my boss, lose my job, and put our family into financial ruin?</span> <span style="font-family: Calibri;">What if my husband dies at a young age and I become a single mother, forced to move back in with my parents for the rest of my life? </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Okay, these fears might sound a bit extreme, but I know I am not the only one struggling with anxious thoughts about the future. I read Facebook posts every day from other women who sound completely stressed out about the future. Sometimes anxiety gets so out of hand, that worries about tomorrow steal the joy away from today. Matthew 6:34 says, "Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself."</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Rather than worry, God commands me not to fear. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Do not be anxious about anything, but in
every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your
requests to God (Philippians 4: 6). </i>Regardless of the circumstances, Christ
wants us to trust Him with the outcome. This does not mean that we should never
have feelings of anxiety or thoughts of worry. Rather, when these feelings and
thoughts come into our hearts and mind, we overcome them through prayer and
petition to God. Once we present our requests, we must allow His peace to guard
our hearts and minds from anxiety. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17768914436706113350noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7914284880515388000.post-17645550869433976312014-08-19T10:19:00.003-07:002014-08-19T10:36:29.314-07:00Deliverance Among the Survivors<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Joel-2-24" style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">My name is Amie, and I'm a believer in Christ who struggles with love addiction, anxiety, and depression. I completed a 12 step recovery program, where together with my sisters in Christ and my sponsor, I admitted that I was powerless over my tendency to do the wrong thing and that my life was unmanageable. As I waded through the traumas and terrible choices of my past, I started to recognize unhealthy patterns in my life. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: large;">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Joel-2-24">I understood that anxiety about the future gripped my mind and paralyzed me. After </span></span><span class="indent-1"><span class="text Joel-2-24">I memorized the Serenity Prayer, I replayed these words over and over to help me overcome. "...Living one day at a time, enjoying one moment at a time, accepting hardship as a pathway to peace, taking as Jesus did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it, trusting that you will make all things right if I surrender to your will..."</span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: large;">
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Joel-2-24">During the study, Joel 2:25-28 and verse 30 became my hope and my comfort <em>(emphasis mine).</em></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Joel-2-24"> </span></span><span class="text Joel-2-25" id="en-NIV-22337">“<em><strong>I will repay you for the years the locusts<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-22337CC" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-22337CC" title="See cross-reference CC">CC</a>)"></sup> have eaten<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-22337CD" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-22337CD" title="See cross-reference CD">CD</a>)"></sup></strong></em>—</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Joel-2-25">the great locust and the young locust,</span></span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Joel-2-25">the other locusts and the locust swarm—</span></span><br /><span class="text Joel-2-25">my great army<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-22337CE" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-22337CE" title="See cross-reference CE">CE</a>)"></sup> that I sent among you.</span><br /><span class="text Joel-2-26" id="en-NIV-22338"><sup class="versenum">26 </sup><strong><em>You will have plenty to eat, until you are full</em></strong>,<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-22338CF" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-22338CF" title="See cross-reference CF">CF</a>)"></sup></span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Joel-2-26">and you will praise<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-22338CG" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-22338CG" title="See cross-reference CG">CG</a>)"></sup> the name of the <span class="small-caps" style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span> your God,</span></span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Joel-2-26">who has worked wonders<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-22338CH" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-22338CH" title="See cross-reference CH">CH</a>)"></sup> for you;</span></span><br /><span class="text Joel-2-26"><em><strong>never again will my people be shamed.<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-22338CI" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-22338CI" title="See cross-reference CI">CI</a>)"></sup></strong></em></span><br /><span class="text Joel-2-27" id="en-NIV-22339"><sup class="versenum">27 </sup>Then you will know<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-22339CJ" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-22339CJ" title="See cross-reference CJ">CJ</a>)"></sup> that I am in Israel,</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Joel-2-27">that I am the <span class="small-caps" style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span><sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-22339CK" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-22339CK" title="See cross-reference CK">CK</a>)"></sup> your God,</span></span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Joel-2-27">and that there is no other;</span></span><br /><span class="text Joel-2-27"><strong><em>never again will my people be shamed.</em></strong></span></span></span><br />
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<span class="text Joel-2-27"></span><span class="text Joel-2-28"><sup class="versenum">28 </sup>“And afterward,</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> <em><strong> </strong></em></span><span class="text Joel-2-28"><em><strong>I will pour out my Spirit<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-22340CM" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-22340CM" title="See cross-reference CM">CM</a>)"></sup> on all people</strong></em>.<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-22340CN" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-22340CN" title="See cross-reference CN">CN</a>)"></sup></span></span><br /><span class="text Joel-2-28"><strong><em>Your sons and daughters will prophesy</em></strong>,<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-22340CO" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-22340CO" title="See cross-reference CO">CO</a>)"></sup></span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Joel-2-28">your old men will dream dreams,<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-22340CP" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-22340CP" title="See cross-reference CP">CP</a>)"></sup></span></span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Joel-2-28">your young men will see visions...</span></span><br /><span class="text Joel-2-32" id="en-NIV-22344"><sup class="versenum">32 </sup><strong><em>And everyone who calls</em></strong></span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"><strong><em> </em></strong></span><span class="text Joel-2-32"><strong><em>on the name of the <span class="small-caps" style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span><sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-22344CW" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-22344CW" title="See cross-reference CW">CW</a>)"></sup> will be saved</em></strong>;<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-22344CX" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-22344CX" title="See cross-reference CX">CX</a>)"></sup></span></span><br /><span class="text Joel-2-32">for on Mount Zion<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-22344CY" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-22344CY" title="See cross-reference CY">CY</a>)"></sup> and in Jerusalem</span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Joel-2-32"><strong><em>there will be deliverance,<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-22344CZ" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-22344CZ" title="See cross-reference CZ">CZ</a>)"></sup></em></strong></span></span></span></span><strong><em><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Joel-2-32">as the <span class="small-caps" style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span> has said,</span></span><br /><span class="text Joel-2-32">even among the survivors<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-22344DA" value="(<a href="#cen-NIV-22344DA" title="See cross-reference DA">DA</a>)"></sup></span><br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Joel-2-32">whom the <span class="small-caps" style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span> calls.</span></span></span></span></em></strong><br />
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<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Joel-2-32">The LORD knows the depths of my sin and the sins committed against me. I am confident of my salvation. But I struggle to entrust my children fully to Him. I panic at the thought of them one day leaving home, never to return or acknowledge my love. I worry that the confusion of their past will harden their hearts against me and cause them to turn away. I desperately want to fix them, to change them, to help them see the beauty that can come from brokenness. </span></span><span class="indent-1"><span class="text Joel-2-32">The LORD knows the depths of depravity that my children's biological families exposed them to and evil deeds done against them in their innocence. The LORD knows I am incapable of healing their wounds, yet He entrusted their lives into my hands as their mother. </span></span></span></span><br />
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<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Joel-2-32">I must trust The One who will repay the years the locusts have eaten from our lives, the years of abuse, neglect, abandonment, and shame. I must trust the one who will provide the food to fill the bellies of the once hungry and terrified children so they will always have plenty to eat. I must trust The One who will pour out His Spirit on my sons and daughters, so they will tell of His work in their lives, how He is the one who brings deliverance to survivors. </span></span></span></span><br />
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<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Joel-2-32">I am the mother that He chose for my children, not because of my great wisdom, but because of my complete dependence upon His guidance. <span class="indent-1"><span class="text Joel-2-32">Because He is faithful, I am able to trust. And when I trust, I am able to enjoy the moments rather than worry the days away, missing the beauty of His hand in all of our lives, bringing all things together for good for those who love Him and are called by Him.</span></span></span></span></span></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17768914436706113350noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7914284880515388000.post-22786717503572868762012-10-10T07:40:00.003-07:002012-10-10T08:09:48.589-07:00SerenityParenting is hard. I often feel like a failure. Sometimes it seems like no matter what we try, we can't get through to our children. Behaviors continue despite every attempt to correct them. The house is a mess all the time. I often wonder to myself if I am really qualified for this job of raising godly children?<br />
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Then I saw this,<br />
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And I remembered the serenity prayer. <br />
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<em>God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.</em> I cannot change my children. That is up to God. <br />
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<em>The courage to change the things I can.</em> I can change my response to my children's behaviors from anger to self-control.<br />
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<em>And the wisdom to know the difference. </em>So God, give me your wisdom in those challenging moments. Help me to have a calm response, <em>grant me serenity. </em><br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17768914436706113350noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7914284880515388000.post-51406750534437585352012-09-21T10:55:00.001-07:002012-09-21T10:55:55.467-07:00Culture of Lies<div>
Our adoptions may not be inter-racial, but they certainly are cross-cultural. My middle children, Mackenzee and Braydyn, lived several years with their birth family in a culture of dishonesty. They learned to speak the language of lies fluently and effortlessly. They were taught by example that lying gets you good things: money, sympathy, and attention. They also learned that by lying you can escape blame and avoid consequences for wrong actions. But Satan is the father of lies, and eventually truth is brought to light. There is no escaping the punishment and suffering for sin. </div>
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As a mother, my heart is grieved over the sins of my children. I suffer when my children suffer. But the same is true for my children. They have suffered so much for the sins of their birth parents. Sometimes I wonder if the suffering will ever end, but I find hope for my children in God's word.</div>
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"'What?' you ask. 'Doesn't the child pay for the parent's sins? No! For <i>if</i> the child does what is just and right and keeps my decrees, that child will surely live. The person who sins is the one who will die. The child will not be punished for the parent's sins, and the parent will not be punished for the child's sins. Righteous people will be rewarded for their own righteous behavior, and wicked people will be punished for their own wickedness." (Ezekiel 18:19-20 NLT)</div>
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The hope is found in one simple word: <i>if</i>. If my children do what is just and right and keep God's decrees, they will escape punishment. It is my task; therefore, to teach my children this principle when they are young so that when they are grown they will love righteousness. As a mother, I want my children to have life just as the Heavenly Father wants his children to have life. "I don't want you to die, says the Sovereign LORD. Turn back and live!" (Ezekiel 18:32 NLT)</div>
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Now I realize the most important lesson I can teach my children is repentance. I explained to my daughter that her lies are called sin because God says not to lie. Then I told her that sin is what separates her from God and the reason why Jesus had to die on the cross for her forgiveness. After I explained this, I asked her to pray about her behavior. </div>
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It worked! She came into my room and quietly admitted that she has been lying. She prayed aloud and wept. "God, help me do better. I hope you can forgive me, and I hope my mom forgives me too." Then I had the joy of quoting this verse to her. "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness."(1 John 1:9 NIV) I told her that God does forgive her and so do I. </div>
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As a parent, I must teach my children that there are consequences for sin. The punishment brings sorrow to the child, but "godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation." (2 Corinthians 7:10)</div>
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And repentance is what changes behavior. God says, "Prove by the way you live that you have repented of your sins and turned to God." (Matthew 3:8 NLT)</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17768914436706113350noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7914284880515388000.post-73327693687422275312012-09-18T17:57:00.000-07:002012-09-18T17:57:07.586-07:00<h2>
My Brown Eyed Girl</h2>
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The other day, I was brushing my four year old daughter's hair after a shower. </div>
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"You have beautiful hair like your birth mom," I told her. </div>
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"I miss her!" she replied. "Do you know where she lives so you can take me to visit her?" she asked.</div>
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"No, I don't. But we will probably see her on Halloween. She likes to go trick-or-treating."</div>
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"Yippee!" She squealed. </div>
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Ever since this conversation, she has talking about seeing her birth family on Halloween. For some adoptive parents, this would have been an uncomfortable exchange with their child, but this is a normal discussion in our family. My four year old daughter doesn't remember much about her birth parents since she has lived with us from infancy, but she knows about her adoption. In the depths of her little heart, she has a special place reserved for her birth mom and dad, and I encourage that. </div>
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It is very important to me that she treasures the beautiful things about herself that come from her biological family. I have hazel eyes and my husband's eyes are bright blue, but she is our brown eyed girl. We are both very tall, but she is so very tiny. We were both generally compliant children, and she is full of fire and strong will. I love all of these things about her so much. I want her to know this. I love all of her, even and especially the traits that don't come from how I am raising her. </div>
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Her birth family has many values, habits, and problems that we pray she doesn't take on as her own when she is grown, but she doesn't need to know about this yet. In time, she will ask why. She will want to know why these people who loved her so much and gave her life did not raise her. When those days come, we will explain a little at a time the reasons why. </div>
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Yet I know in my heart the reason why she is mine is because God ordained her to be mine. His hand was always upon her, protecting her, keeping her safe for me. He prompted her birth mother's heart to pick up the phone at desperate times and ask me to come and take the tiny baby she loved into my home. He provided clothing and diapers and bottles and babysitters through people led by His Spirit to love us into our new role as parents. He calmed my anxious heart and answered my desperate prayers to make her forever mine. And now my prayer is that He would make her forever His, that through my parenting she would know the love of her heavenly Father.</div>
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Ephesians 1:11</div>
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We were also chosen to belong to him. God decided to choose us long ago in keeping with his plan. He works out everything to fit his plan and purpose. (NIRV)</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17768914436706113350noreply@blogger.com2